i'm not kidding, this is your last chance to look away.
meet my right foot:
it's...a foot. nothing special, really--just 15 layers of pink toe-nail polish, because when it chips i just paint over it. and, really? that's on a good day. if it's not summer, they pretty much chip away into oblivion.
then there's my toe ring, which i got in islamorada a week after my 21st birthday. it hasn't been off my toe since. not even for 5 seconds. and i really hope it never falls off or breaks or anything, because i think i have a permaneant dent around my toe now.
that's my right foot.
nothing special, just a normal happy old foot.
and then there's my left foot:
apparently this is what a foot will do, if you fall down the stairs and crunch it very badly.
it will also hurt a good bit.
so, this is my public service announcement:
don't fall down your stairs!
edited to add:
no, i was not drunk when i fell down the stairs. i was just a jackass. as usual.