how you can tell that you're hanging out with my family

~overheard shortly before dinner tonight~

me: so, what's the name of this red wine that i'm actually liking?

aunt mary: i know! i'm liking it, too, and i'm so excited because normally i don't like red wine at all. and, you know, red wine is actually kind-of good for you.

tom 3: is it as good for you as vodka?

me: i seriously doubt that.

aunt mary: speaking of vodka, where's papa?