Thursday, November 16, 2006

the vinny and tiffany monty python tribute band

last night i came to work and very quickly realized that i was not all about bartending that day. come to think of it, i can't remember ever having been all about bartending. which is unfortunate, since bartending has been my job for 10 years. anyway, the point is, i did not want to work last night.


at 6:35 p.m. i sent my friend vinny (aka big furry bear) a text message that said:
hey, wanna close the bar tonight?*

he did not answer me.
i wouldn't have answered me, either.

so then, at 7:30 i sent him a another text message which said fine. but i'm farting in your general direction.

and that was when we lost our minds for a second, and this happened...

vinny: are you taunting me a second time?

me: yes, but you turned me into a newt.

vinny: a newt? have you seen any knights who say 'ni' running around? i hear they've been spotted in ann arbor.

~real life interruption~

the phone: ring, ring, ring.

me: the (insert name of sportsbar here).

vinny: NONE SHALL PASS!!!!(hangs up on me)

me: (giggling uncontrollably)

bar guests: (inwardly) i think something may be seriously wrong with this girl.

~end real life interruption, return to text messaging, which is far more fun than bartending~

vinny: how do you think i got this outrageous french accent?

vinny: time to rent Holy Grail. SNAP!

me: snapalicious

me again, because i DO NOT know when to give up: are there any women here today?

vinny: um...that's the wrong movie :-)

me: i can see you repressing me

vinny: the ministry of silly walks

me: i don't know that one

vinny: how not 2b seen. the twit of the year contest. all are from flying circus

me: listen, i came here for an argument, and this is just contradiction.

vinny: i'll have the spam spam spam spam eggs spam and spam. oh i'm sorry we're out of spam.

me: perhaps you should try the crunchy frog.

~real life interrupts again, because vinny shows up at the bar, no more texting until...~

(3:30 am)

vinny: elderberries!!! hahahahaha!

me: don't talk about your balls that way

*this was somewhat ridiculous, because the shift starts at 6 p.m. and people ususally like to have some advance notice about the whole working thing.


Anonymous lama... said...


11:05 PM  
Blogger tiffany said...

so, you've shortened your name to just 'lama' now?
little do you know that is a monty python reference, too!

11:25 PM  
Blogger stewchang said...

found your blog searching technorati for ann arbor and after reading the last five posts you've made, must say, i like. your rules for bar behavior are excellent. the text messages in this one are, well, confusing.

12:47 AM  
Blogger tiffany said...

yeah, sorry about that, stewchang.
they only make sense to monty python enthusiasts.
the main point was that my friend vinny and i are huge dorks who enjoy text messaging way too much.

i'm pretty sure that message made it through...
anyway, welcome to tiffanyland!

1:05 AM  
Blogger stewchang said...

you monty python fans are rare and getting rarer all the time. unless you count the spamalot johnny come latelies. thanks for linking me, btw.

11:42 AM  
Blogger Mikala said...

Ya know? Spamelot is in St. Louis right now and you got me thinking about it now.

3:17 PM  
Blogger Mikala said...

Oh, and Tiffany, I added you to my list of links because I really have to check you daily - you make me laugh and I really need to laugh more.

3:31 PM  
Blogger Jen said...

freakin funny! i love monty python.... i got like, the majority of those.

4:34 PM  
Blogger Pete said...

I saw Spamalot here in Pittsburgh. It was really funny. You should totally go and see it if you have the chance. You'll love it.


9:51 PM  
Blogger Keather said...

"I'm not dead yet!"

5:22 PM  

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