Monday, November 06, 2006

in which i surprise myself

remember when i talked about some of the things my mom taught me? like, "say please and thank-you, wash your hands, and for heaven's sake don't pick up hitch-hikers?"

well, today i broke one of those rules.

i was driving home from work. it was about 3 am.
just before the entrance to my apartment complex, i passed a woman who was sort of hobbling along the side of the road. i got a really good look at her, because i had already slowed down for the turn into the complex, which is how i noticed that she glanced at my car with a look of--well, it can only be described as a sort of suspicious fear.

and i have no idea what came over me, but i pulled over to see if she needed some help.

i didn't even think about it for one second.

i am really surprised that i did this.
now, let me be clear that i would NEVER have stopped to pick up a man who was walking on the side of the road. i wouldn't say that i live in the ghetto, but i don't live in the greatest area, either. i've seen several reports in the paper of women who got their purses stolen in the parking lots of my apartment complex.* so, even though there is a tiny little piece of me that feels like a bad person, it is true that i would definitely not let a strange man into my car.**
still, it surprises me that i stopped to help the woman without even thinking about it AT ALL. because, you know, women are capable of evil and maliciousness just as much as men are. and this woman was definitely bigger than me. although, she was bigger than me in a way which probably would have been more of a hinderence to her, had she desired to harm me in some way.

anyhow, as it turns out, she didn't have any desire to hurt me.
she didn't speak much english--i think she was some flavor of african but i'm only guessing because she was black and she had on some kind of tribal flavored clothing, but for all i know she could be from sweden and just likes to wear robes. the world is a crazy place. you just never know what you're going to get.
wherever she was from, she just needed a ride to her car, which was about 2 miles up the road.
while i couldn't understand most of what she was saying--and she was saying a lot of something--i did catch the part where she said 'thank-you' and 'god bless you' about 500 times.

and, if you'll pardon the cheesey interruption in what's normally a very cynical and malcontented blog, i was really overcome with a feeling of some kind of goodness. let me be clear--it wasn't a feeling of being a good person, it was just a good feeling. like, a REALLY good feeling of the type one doesn't normally come across while bartending.

so, anyway, that's the story.
i picked up a hitchhiker.
i wasn't chopped into a million pieces and tossed on the side of the road.
the end.

*attn: any crazy people living in my apartment complex who may read this blog. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STEAL MY PURSE! it is a coach purse and it was a present and i love it and i will fight you for it and i don't think you want to end up going to jail because you accidentally killed some poor girl for her purse which probably only has $13 and a maxed out credit card in it anyway thank-you very much.
**once someone asked me, 'tiffany, what if that hitchhiker who you leave on the road is actually jesus in disguise, testing you to see if you're a good person or not?'
to which i say, PLEASE! i think jesus is well aware of the dangerous state of the world today and respects my desire to keep my body in one piece because, life is a gift, people! if jesus has any questions about the state of my soul, i trust he would find a sneakier way to test me than the hitchhiking thing. and let's just hope it doesn't involve reading this blog.


Blogger Steph said...

tiffany-who-majored-in-lit: "2 miles up the rode"??? It's gotta be late at night or something right?

and also, I feel ya on the coach purse business. i have one. i would fight a crazyass bag-snatcher for it any day of the week.
and the maxed out credit card.
and the not picking up men thing.

if i saw jesus walking, i'd probably pick him up though. and take him home to read your blog so we could all have a good laugh. god knows he must need one.

5:25 AM  
Blogger tiffany said...

yes. for me, 4:30 am is late at night, not early in the morning.

verrrrrrry sleepy.

5:55 AM  
Blogger Michelle said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

1:53 PM  
Blogger Michelle said...

Wow - very good work Tiffany! I, for one, was taught the same thing you were - "don't pick up hitchhikers" and I must say, I've NEVER even given it a second thought. I watch all those Justice Files and stuff on TV and I'm just too scared. I'm a wussy.

That's really cool that you did that though.

Sorry - I deleted my previous comment (which said exactly what I posted above) on accident.

1:54 PM  
Anonymous lamamala said...

there are other ways to attain the "good all over" feeling!! Especially at that hour......too dangerous. Stifle yourself next time and go volunteer at Safe House or something for gods sake!

10:23 PM  
Blogger Ryan said...

In Australia at least, the odds of the person dicing you up are so small, and the odds of them being desperately in need of a lift are sufficiently large, that I figure it's usually a good bet to pick someone up. I know I've been in need of a lift much more often than I've had any urge to dice someone up.

4:14 PM  
Blogger tiffany said...

perhaps i should move to australia...
let's see how this election goes.

i know i was definitely thinking about it 2 years ago.

5:05 PM  
Blogger KaY said...

Hahaha! loved the ** notes ... that was a hoot!

But I do understand where you are coming from. My brother got his phone stolen the other day by a woman who had a baby with her. A baby ... she used the baby to distract my brother while she was stealing his phone.

But I'm glad you helped the old lady ... and yes, I'm sure Jesus would understand.

5:36 PM  

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