interlude

~crazy things are afoot in the land of tiffany.
crazy, i say. and i think we all know that i'm an authority in that area.
anyhow, the craziness is not currently up for discussion, but rather than reaching for the bottle of xanax, i've decided to blog. about something completely random that happened more than four years ago.
enjoy.~

my family is crazy. you're shocked, i know.
but my family is crazy in a good way--at least, once you get to know them. if you don't know us very well, we can be a little...much. to say the least.

i hadn't been dating john for very long when we went over to have dinner at my parent's house for the first time. he had met my parents--i think we'd gone out a couple of times, but it was before they'd spent any real time together.
anyhow, as we're sitting around the dinner table, the wine is just a-flowing away to everyone except john, who's not really a drinker.*
after abour 3/4 of a glass (it doesn't take much), my mom starts telling us about her favorite new t.v. show, real sex, on hbo.
my mom just could not get over the crazy things that you can see on cable televison--she watched a man get his penis pierced! can you believe that!

anyway, then she started explaining 'the craziest thing she had ever seen' to us.
apparently real sex had done a segment about a group of people who had some sort of bizarre horse fetish? i guess the people would get together--a big, old group of them--and they would get naked and run around pretending they were horses. they never had any actual sex or anything. although, sometimes they would ride around on each other. or something. i never saw the episode, myself.

and, really?
i didn't need to.
because my mother decided she wasn't telling the story well enough. i guess she thought that john and i weren't REALLY GETTING how crazy it actually was.

so she got up, and started trotting around the dinner table.
making horse noises.
and then my dad got up and started skipping along behind her, pretending like he was whipping her.**

and, really?
i have to end this entry now.

because what can i even begin to say about that?

*he'll have a beer--sometimes even two!--but i think in four and a half years i've only seen him drunk twice. which is excellent, because i almost always have someone to drive me home.
**thank god, they kept their clothes on for this demonstration.