Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Postmodernism and A Fear of the Future

Literature majors of the world should take a minute to unite right now--wait, I guess no other literature majors read this blog.
Well, anyway--if you are a lit major and you ever read this I'm just trying to say that reading literary theory is like giving yourself fifteen billion and eleventy thousand paper cuts all over your body and then pouring vodka on them. But, totally no vodka is allowed to go in your mouth, where it clearly belongs.
In other words, it sucks.
I mean, it has a purpose and all that. And important things to say and whatnot and ok, fine, I admit it, I actually mostly like it.
Don't tell anyone.
But I do still have one complaint: stop with the 30 thousand word sentences.
For real, people.
We already know you're smart, or else why would you be writing literary theory to begin with? Stop it with the superiority complex already. This is my advice to you, important literary critic people of the world.

Ok, now that my little rant is out of the way.

Today in class we were discussing postmodernism. Which I won't go into detail about because no one cares. Which is actually sort of appropriate for a discussion of postmodernism, but whatever.
Anyway, the point is that lately everyone always feels like they're living after something.
I mean, there was the Victorian repressive-stick-up-the-ass-mind-your-manners age, followed by the modern age where everyone was all woo-hoo! Look at me! I have bad manners! I draw strange ugly pictures of people who don't really look like people but they are people because I say so! I write stories about topics you consider inappropriate! I am a rebel! Aren't you shocked by me? And now we're just postmodern. We don't need a new name. We're all desensitized and whatnot. Nothing shocks us because we are so, soo cool.
At least that's what the theorists are trying to say--in much more verbose language, of course.
As for me, I think we call ourselves postmodern because it's better than talking about either what we actually are now, or what we're on the way to being.

pre-apocalypsism, anyone?


except, it's really not funny at all.


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